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Aug
31
Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad!
2009 at 10am Posted by Rebecca Schinsky
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It was August 31, 1975, and it was a sweltering hot day in Moultrie, Georgia. The tiny church was packed with people—thanks to my dad’s mother, who had taken her limited number of invitations and used them to invite everyone she had ever met by including seven or eight names on each envelope–and the air conditioning wasn’t working so well. The men all had long hair and full beards, making my dad’s side of the wedding pictures look a the cover of a BeeGees album, and my mother had for some unknown reason chosen a wedding dress with long lace sleeves.
It wasn’t the most comfortable day, but it was beautiful nonetheless, and it marked the celebration of a relationship that began when they were just 15 years old and that is still going strong today.
When people ask if my parents are still married, I’m thrilled to be able to say that yes, they are, and it’s not just out of obligation or tradition or some weird “staying together for the kids” thing. They still really like each other, and it shows!
And they’re pretty cool, too. Here they are rocking the Blues Brothers sunglasses during their toast at my wedding.

Since I can’t be with them to make a toast at dinner tonight, please join me as I raise my proverbial glass right here, for all the world to see.
Mom and Dad, you have set an amazing example of what marriage and partnership are all about. You have allowed us to see you celebrate life’s joys and mourn its sorrows, and you’ve shown us what it means to work together through the hard times, knowing that there is always another good moment just around the corner. Your commitment and dedication to our family and to each other are awesome and inspiring.
Thank you for teaching me what it means to love someone warts-and-all, for sharing your wisdom and experiences with me, and for never failing to offer that perfect piece of advice or insight. As I look forward to celebrating my second anniversary in a few months, I can only hope that we will succeed in making our marriage even half as full of life and love as you have made yours.
Here’s to 34 more wonderful years!
The Sunday Salon 8.30.09
2009 at 11am Posted by Rebecca Schinsky
It’s 10:51 am, about the time I normally roll out of bed on Sunday mornings, but I’ve already been up for more than three hours. Guess that’s just what happens when the hubby goes out of town and the dog decides she NEEDS HER WALK at 7:15. Such is life.
So I’ve walked the dog. I’ve had two cups of coffee. I’ve watched Friday night’s episode of What Not to Wear, and I’ve spent a little more time with Lorrie Moore and A Gate at the Stairs. Not a bad way to start the day.
This week has been a little unusual for me in terms of reading, blogging, and reading blogs because of BBAW panel stuff, but I’m having a great time visiting new blogs and getting really excited for the main event in a couple weeks.
This week I featured a discussion about novelists writing real people into fiction, and there have been some really interesting comments. I hope you’ll stop by that post and share your ideas as well. I also tried out a new weekend review format for American Nerd by Benjamin Nugent.
I probably could have gotten more reading done these last few days, but I’ve been glued to the DVD player and season 2 of Gossip Girl. It’s mildy embarassing, but I like to indulge in these things when hubby’s away (so I can avoid his merciless teasing), and the entertainment gluttony has been pretty great. Add to it the John Hughes movie fest I had with a few girlfriends yesterday (16 Candles and a birthday cake to eat with it? Perfect!), and you’ve got the makings of a fabulous weekend.
(and yes, I’m still wearing my pajamas)
I have a few hours before I have to head off for some quality time with my nieces and nephew, who are convinced I’m pretty much the coolest person ever because I let them eat frozen cookie dough last time I babysat, so I think it’s time to catch up on some blog reading, spend a little more time with Ms. Moore, and maybe squeeze in another episode or two of Gossip Girl.
It’s a wild life I’m living, let me tell you.
What are you up to today?
The Weekend Review: American Nerd by Benjamin Nugent
2009 at 10am Posted by Rebecca Schinsky
Weekends are busy, right? So I’m trying this new format for weekend reviews, more of a quick hit approach. Tell me what you think!
Now available in paperback from Scribner (a division of Simon and Schuster)
The Quick & Dirty
Former nerd Benjamin Nugent sets out to “take a serious approach to a subject usually treated lightly, which is a nerdy thing to do.” American Nerd is a sociological exploration of the history, subcultures, rules, and rituals of nerdiness in which Nugent examines media depictions of nerdiness and their impact on how we conceptualize nerds and nerd culture(s).
The Big Ideas
“Nerdiness isn’t really a matter of intellectualism and social awkardness.” Instead, Nugent contends that there are two types of nerds: a mostly male group who are intellectual in a way that is perceived as machinelike—capable of thinking but not feeling—and that cripples their ability to socialize and a group comprised equally of males and females who are made nerds “by sheer force of social exclusion.”
Many groups of nerds are united by a desire to remove the ambiguity from human interactions and spoken language. This contributes to their appearance of being machinelike and to the idea that many nerds prefer computers over people. It also contributes to nerds’ preferences for games like Dungeons & Dragons and for “rule-bound, rational communication.” But there are things going on beneath the surface that compel individuals to seek out these types of groups and interactions. Nugent recounts knowing several nerds whose homelives were so unstable that the appeal of fantasy games and “a heavily rule-bound universe” become easily understandable. So, nerdiness is not necessarily inborn; it can be a product of nurture just as much as it is of nature.
Society’s distinctions between thinking and feeling “making people who are good at reasoning…appear as if they’re not entitled to a normal emotional life.” Nerds know that other people accept this dualism, and when they accept it themselves and become concerned with how others perceive them, they become self-loathing. Enter the self-fulfilling prophecy through which nerds come to believe they are incapable of social interaction, through which they buy into society’s denial of their sexuality and interpersonal needs. This is a problem.
But nerds need love too! And high school debate competitions are evidence of this. Why? Because debate is fun, but it “is also something nerds do in order to meet other nerds they can hit on.” The second part of American Nerd, titled “Among the Nerds,” is more memoir than sociological study, and Nugent’s account of a debate competition is quite humorous.
Though often arbitrary, some definitions and depictions of nerdiness serve social and political functions. Nugent explores the history of the word nerd and its association with various racial and ethnic groups, showing that nerdiness is a stop along the road to prosperity. When new groups first come to America, they often work jobs that consist mostly of unthinking activity—menial tasks and manual labor. Then they study hard and swing to the other end of the spectrum by becoming nerdy before finally reaching the destination of WASPy well-roundedness. Of course, not all groups follow this trajectory, but it’s an interesting idea. Groups in power have sought to depict other groups as nerdy as a way to make them less of a threat.
Other Fun Stuff
- Nugent credits Saturday Night Live with being most influential in defining modern representations of nerds, and he gives the TV series Freaks and Geeks credit for showing that nerds are people, too. It “took a network audience accustomed to hot people solving problems and instead asked them to find beauty in unhot people learning to deal with the insolubility of problems.”
- Hipster culture seeks to employ “the cultural capital of quirk” by co-opting “nerdiness as an aesthetic.” Put simply, hipster cliches like big glasses, high jeans, Pabst Blue Ribbon, and purist obsessions
Connote sophistication and cosmopolitanism by screaming “We are not cosmopolitan! We are not culturall sophisticated!
- Nugent briefly explores the “ideological component” of the increased diagnosis of Asperger’s and autism spectrum disorders and how they are related to social definitions of nerdiness, masculininity, and the importance of empathy. I found these ideas very interesting and wanted Nugent to expound on them further.
- Depictions of nerds in literature extend back several hundred years. Nugent explores some from Jane Austen, Mary Shelley, and P.G. Wodehouse, among others, and I loved it!
The Bottom Line
American Nerd is a fun read that is part sociological exploration and part memoir. Though a bit dry at times, it is generally enjoyable, always interesting, and rather creative. Recommended for readers who enjoy a modern take on niche cultural anthropology and for anyone who has ever felt nerdy. Isn’t that all of us?
Writing real people into fiction?
2009 at 10am Posted by Rebecca Schinsky
I read an interesting post on The Guardian’s book blog last week about the issues related to novelists using real people as characters. While the author of that article focuses mostly on privacy and whether authors have the right to use real people as characters, what I want to know is: how do you feel about it?
When Curtis Sittenfeld’s American Wife came out last summer, I devoured it in two sittings. It was a fun, scandalicious read, even though I did think it could have been shorter, but I just couldn’t quite love it. Why?
Because I knew the main character was not-so-loosely based on Laura Bush, and the whole thing where novelists imagine real people into their stories just doesn’t work for me. It seems somehow lazy and opportunistic, at least when the real people become the central characters of an unreal tale, and especially when the book is clearly intended to stir up controversy and create a buzz. (It doesn’t help that American Wife‘s release coincided with the 2008 Republican National Convention, either. Brilliant marketing, but it rubbed me the wrong way.)
Ms. Sittenfeld wrote a pretty good book, but could she have been equally successful with a similar book not based on a real woman whose husband was the most divisive president in recent memory? Probably not. And that just doesn’t sit well with me.
It is what’s kept me away from Loving Frank and T.C. Boyle’s The Women, though I’ve been interested in both of them, and it’s made me reticent to pick up The Hours, even though I’m almost positive I’d like it, and Sunnyside, which looks downright wonderful. Sure, these historical figures make for compelling stories, but can authors who have never known them really re-create their inner lives and do them any justice? Even if they can, should they?
Now, I’m not altogether opposed to seeing real people appear in fiction. In fact, I appreciate it when authors include political figures and celebrities from their chosen era on the periphery of stories because it provides context. It gives me a way to get my footing if the time or place I’m reading about is relatively foreign. And I sometimes enjoy it when authors imagine fictional people into real-life events. Wally Lamb does it when he puts Caelum and Maureen Quirk in Columbine High School in The Hour I First Believed. Jamie Ford does it in Hotel on the Corner of Bitter and Sweet. Kathryn Stockett uses everyday folks in the middle of the civil rights movement in The Help, with a little contextual boost provided by characters who discuss real-life events that give the story weight and increased presence.
So it can work, this business of writing real people into fiction, but I think it’s tricky business and best done in small doses.
What about you? What were your reactions to the books I’ve mentioned here? Have you read anything else that fits this model and was really well done? Or not? Let’s talk about it.
In which I disappear for a few days…
2009 at 2pm Posted by Rebecca Schinsky
So BBAW is right around the corner, and I know that you know this because I (and pretty much every other book blogger) have been talking, tweeting, and emailing about it nonstop for the past couple weeks. I had such a great time during last year’s BBAW that I volunteered to help out this time around, so I’m chairing one of the award panels. This past week was filled with notification emails, spreadsheets, updated spreadsheets, incoming links from nominees, and excessive tromping around the blogosphere trying to find other information I needed to make my part of this thing happen.
And people, I am tired! I don’t know how My Friend Amy does it. Is she sleeping? Is she eating? Has she discovered some amazing energy drink the rest of us don’t know about yet? Did she find a real-life version of those little stars that give the Super Mario Bros. an extra boost?
Since I spent yesterday at a baseball game against my will, and since the outing then turned into a whole-day event that included an extra long dinner and ended with me and hubby getting home at 11pm and falling directly into bed, I’m already a step or two behind in my panel chairperson duties. So I probably won’t be around much this week.
Instead, I’ll be emailing my panel members, visiting blogs to read posts by my category’s nominees, and carefully filling in scorecards. And I’m sure I’ll be learning some new tricks in Excel along the way. (I certainly hope so….I might be toast without them.)
But reading and then blogging about what I’m reading? Not so much.
It will all be worth it when BBAW 2009 rocks even harder than last year’s, so for now, I need to find a nice, quiet place to hide out with my laptop and get some awards stuff done.
See you in a few!
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