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Apr
17
That brought you here?
2009 at 9am Posted by Rebecca Joines Schinsky
It is a truth universally acknowledged that when you blog about a variety of books, some of which discuss sexuality, you’re going to get some bizarre search terms. This is a fact I’ve come to accept, and it’s one that never fails to entertain. But sometimes it’s a little disturbing. Thank goodness there are other equally weird but less crazy terms that bring people here as well. Here are some of the more interesting searches that have brought people to The Book Lady’s Blog in the last month or so. Be warned, a few of them are pretty gross.
The deep thoughts…
Do all songs have to have words? No. And not all poetry has to rhyme. If you want to make it on to Top 40 radio or something, words might be a good idea, though.
Who is Torsten Krol? Nobody knows. That’s kind of the point. But he sure wrote a funny book.
I don’t want you kicking the bucket. Thanks! I plan on hanging around for a while longer.
Twilight worst series: I don’t know if I’d go that far, but I did think it was pretty bad.
I am feeling the love: Um, I’m happy for you? Did you just need to tell someone, or what?
Why should the customer always be right? They shouldn’t….because they aren’t. Don’t believe me? Check this out.
Do you alphabetize Dr. Seuss under D or S? For reals? S. Definitely S. Would you put Mr. Rogers under M? Wait, don’t answer that.
The head scratcher
beer camel I got nothin. Perhaps you were looking for this:
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0R04rPITyBo]
The Ick Factor
cannibals sex blog If such a thing exists—and I’m sure it does—I don’t really want to know about it. And why the hell do you? What’s wrong with you? A blog about either cannibalism or sex isn’t enough for you? You need one about cannibals who have sex? I know how you got here, but please, don’t come back.
saw my little sister pubic hair And why do I need to know this? How did that make you feel? And why on earth are you trying to tell someone about it online? Does your poor little sister know you’re a perv?
books on how to do sex with woman I think this is pretty comprehensive, and these are also good. But here’s a thought: when you find a woman who is willing to “do sex” with you, why don’t you just ask her what she likes? I know. It’s a radical notion.
mother masturbates her sun Now that’s just wrong. I mean, really. Everything about this, from the content to the misspelling, is just straight-up disturbing. Sadly, it reminds me of the Jerry Springer taping I attended. (When you go to college in Chicago, it’s kind of a rite of passage. It was 8 years ago, and I’m still scarred.)
The one that makes it all better
I got a fever Sorry to hear that. Christopher Walken will make it all better.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q4royOLtvmQ]
Okay, Ick Factor is a mild term for that particular category.
Jerry Springer? Really? I watched a show once on Lobster Boy and circus freaks and I was scarred for life and I wasn’t in the audience.
You went to a taping for the Jerry Springer Show? My sympathies.
Lezlie
I get a lot of hits I can’t account for. Sometimes I have to do some research to clear up the mystery. I had posted an historical piece on the anniversary of the Boston Tea Party, and when the hits started spiking on it a couple of weeks ago, I had no idea what was going on (not being a follower of the conservative press). Which is actually another interesting subject. Is the information to which we have access getting too compartmentalized because we can pick and choose now?
Now I’m getting a weird spike of hits for the birthday post I put up for Alyce of At Home With Books. What’s it all about? It’s still a mystery to me!
The mother and sun is just disturbing. But you made me laugh, so thanks!
Ummmm….that was so awful!! Every day I get at least a couple hits for ‘nonfiction sex stories,’ because I did a review of Emergency Sex and Other Desperate Measures (it’s the memoirs of three UN workers) under the title “A Nonfiction Spin on Short Story Sunday.” I always figure they’re pretty disappointed!
Ugghh…what creepy search terms! I’ve been getting a lot of book summaries searches, several looking for free Jodi Picoult pdfs (?) and one for 976BABE (I’m certain my hubby did this one. He discovered that find the seach terms that bring people to my blog and decided to mess with me!) but nothing nearly as creepy as these!
The mother may have masturbated her sun, but boy did she get burned for doing it! LOL!
Now, here’s a dumb question–how DO you alphabetize Mr. Rogers? Is it under “M” or “R?” Duh?
I’ve been kinda disappointed at how boring my search terms have been – until I read this. Now I’m kinda glad I’m not attracting weirdos. . .
I did get one from Tunisia searching for the phrase “content warning,” but that’s about it. Other oddities include “alice in wonderland unsunk chin video” and “falwell ministries on twilight saga.”
ew… Mostly, I get some variation on the “free” and “homework” type.
I just had a book lady moment I had to tell you about, by the way. I went to Borders at lunch and there was this guy who cut in front of the line to ask the lady at the counter what his PIN was for his credit card! She seemed flabbergasted at first but then told him to call his bank. He couldn’t figure out why the PIN wasn’t printed on the card. After he left, the book lady called out to her colleague something like, we’ve got a new one! Clearly, they like to swap stories as much as you do! =)
Here’s what I have to put up with:
“how to draw zombies”
“how to become a zombie”
“likelihood of zombie attack”
“is it possible to become a zombie”
“zombie will they come?”
“is there going to be a zombie invasion”
“description of a zombie fight”
“medication treat zombie wound”
“when is next zombie invasion”
“zombie poop”
“are there zombies in utah”
[...] That brought you here? [...]
I had to share. I did a post called “I like big fat naked lady” on a bizarre search term that led someone to my blog. Now it is one of my most popular posts ever. People seem to be able to find it even when they can’t spell ‘nakid.’ Or is that ‘nakid’? Wait, ‘nake’?…
I was laughing at Dr. Seuss … When we were first married I was combining our CDs and putting them in alphabetical order (yes, when people still bought CDs!). J couldn’t find Led Zeppelin because I put it under Z (I alsp put Jethro Tull under T)
I was laughing at Dr. Seuss … When we were first married I was combining our CDs and putting them in alphabetical order (yes, when people still bought CDs!). J couldn’t find Led Zeppelin because I put it under Z (I also put Jethro Tull under T)
[...] what is always a fun exercise for bloggers, Rebecca at The Book Lady’s Blog takes a look at the search terms that brought readers to her [...]