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What was that about the customer always being right? (Adventures in Bookselling v. 13)
2009 at 1pm Posted by Rebecca Joines Schinsky
It’s been a while, so I figured it’s about time for another round of entertaining customer stories. I also figured that if I went ahead with this post it might encourage a certain coworker (he knows who he is) to finally write up the adventure he had more than a month ago so we can finally share it with you. Trust me, it’s funny. Until then, here are a few fun ones.
The difference between letters and numbers…apparently, it’s not-so-obvious.
A customer came in looking for a book called Chaloo. It’s something to do with philosophy, but it’s hard to find or out of print, and I couldn’t locate a picture of the cover or a link to a description anywhere. Anyway, the wackiness occurred when the bookseller asked the customer to spell the title, and she said, “C-H-A-L-zero-zero.”
Not knowing whether it was one of those weird titles that actually uses letters in the place of numbers like N9Ne or something, the bookseller typed it in the way the customer had said it. Whadya know, there’s nothing. “Are you sure that’s how it’s spelled?” he asked her. She swore that it was, but the bookseller decided to do some exploring and typed it in with Os in the place of zeros. Whadya know, he found it.
So he turned the screen around so the customer could see it and confirm it was the correct book, and he said “You see, it’s C-H-A-L-O-O, not zero zero.”
“Well, it’s the same thing,” she grumbled.
“No, ma’am, it’s not. You told me zero, which is a number. O is a letter.”
“Well goddamnit, let’s not split hairs,” she yelled at him.
The bookseller explained that he wasn’t trying to be difficult but that he needed accurate information to be able to find the title, and the customer just continued to yell and curse at him until he walked away.
So those people who say you don’t learn much in kindergarten? They’re wrong. Clearly, this lady missed the day that they explained the difference between numbers and letters. God only knows what would happen if she had to report a license plate number.
Today in botched titles…
The Great Gatsby has been a popular one lately. I personally rescued a woman who had been frantically searching for it for half an hour….in the kids’ department, and a coworker retrieved it recently for a high school student who needed to read a book called The Great Gift by Scott Gerald. Mr. Scott Gerald, if you’re out there, please oh please write a book called The Great Gift so I can sell it to people like this and make you a million dollars. Ditto for Lee Harper, who could make a total killing, natch, which How to Kill A Mockingbird.
Did you know that Julius Caesar had a sister? And that Shakespeare wrote a play about her, too? Another high school student approached a bookseller a few weeks ago and handed him a piece of paper with “Shakespeare—Julia Caesar” written on it. Of course, the bookseller knew what she really needed and gave her a copy of Julius Caesar, but she looked at him funny when he handed it to her, like she thought maybe he was trying to full one over on her.
And now for my favorite of the week….I’m sure it happens pretty frequently, but I still find it funny.
If you’re looking for these:
None of the words in the title rhymes with this:
‘Nuff said.
E-Nun-See-Ate!
This story was submitted by one of my coworkers. Enjoy!
So, I’m working back in kids when I’m approached by this woman.
Woman: Do you have any word list books?
Me: Do you have any particular grade level in mind?
Woman: No, just word list books.
Me: Okay, just to be sure I understood you, you did say word LIST, L-I-S-T, and not word-LESS, L-E-S-S?
Woman: Yeah, word list. L-I-S-T.
Me: Okay, here our are language arts books — here’s a few that have stories in them and accompanying vocabulary lists.
Woman: Oh no, I need something for a baby.
Me: You need a word list book for a baby?
Woman: Yes!
Me: Well, we’ve got the pre-K level stuff here, but they don’t really make word list books or vocabulary boosters for anyone younger. You probably want to look at some of the ABC/123 board books over here…
Woman: But they’ll have words in them!
Me: (sigh) Are you looking for picture books without any words in them?
Woman: YES!
Me: Could I ask why you described them as word LIST books?
Woman: That’s what my friend asked me to get.
Me: Do you think she meant word-LESS books?
Woman: (thinks) Maybe.
Me: (face palm)
There you have it, folks. Just another day in the trenches.
Related posts:
- Mysteries in Bookselling, v.2
- Save the drama for your mama: Adventures in Bookselling, v. 6
- Just when we think it can't get any weirder (Adventures in Bookselling, v.11.5)
- The Sixty-Four Thousand Dollar Question! (Adventures in Bookselling, v. 14)
- And do you have any beaver handpuppets? (Adventures in Bookselling, v.5)
How to Kill A Mockingbird. Wow, that totally changes the plot, doesn’t it? And now I’m picturing a Veggie Tales tarot deck. Fun.
Reminds me of a chemistry class I took years ago. The teacher had a wee little speech impediment. He was discussing “free oxygen” and wrote 0 2 on the board. I thought he meant “three” oxygen molecules and couldn’t figure out why he’d written 2. We went around for a few minutes, me not understanding, him saying “free..free!!” and me responding with, “I know! Three! So why is the number two written down next to the symbol for oxygen?” He reponds “FREE!! FREE!!” I say…again “I KNOW!! SO WHY DO YOU HAVE 2 WRITTEN DOWN!!” until he took a piece of chalk, and wrote across the board in two foot tall letters FREE. Okey dokey then…..as I slid down in my seat…..redfaced and embarassed beyond belief!
Yes…a high point in my education…….
The “customer is always right example was too funny: DITZZY
You make me miss my bookstore days!
Yesterday we had someone come up to the reference desk & ask for the book The Man Who Made Mirrors. We all had a good laugh when we figured out she really wanted Man Who Made Vermeers
Maybe the O/0 lady was L337
(Wow, I’m a nerd.)
You mean it’s not pronounced tarrit? I’m so embarassed!
I’m telling ya, alarms should go off when these folks enter the store.
Oh, and this is a little nudge for your co-worker. Man, we are dying here. Write it up!
These posts always make me laugh. Keep ‘em coming!
LOL! I guess you need Tarot cards to work in a bookstore. It might give you a few answers to those questions.
Btw, I left you an award on my blog.
People are unbelievable! These posts are always so funny. =)
This post made me laugh out loud. I am featuring it on my Marvelous Mondays post. Which it’s so late it almost did not happen on a Monday!
Okay, you’ve convinced me: I must write down the stories of book searches in our library. Our school is for four year olds through eight year olds….some who do not speak English as a native language….Yes, yes, yes, we have some wonderful stories!
I always die laughing when you share these stories. I’m guilty myself of saying “oh” when I mean “zero”, especially when reciting a phone number to someone. -cringe-
I just adore these segments.
… and the collapse of civilization inches ever-closer …
Jeane, I think that’s OK. When someone says “oh” while reciting a number, we know it means zero. But you can’t switch it around and say zero when you mean ‘Oh.”
[...] What was that about the customer always being right? (Adventures in Bookselling v. 13) « The Book L… "It’s been a while, so I figured it’s about time for another round of entertaining customer stories. I also figured that if I went ahead with this post it might encourage a certain coworker (he knows who he is) to finally write up the adventure he had more than a month ago so we can finally share it with you. Trust me, it’s funny. Until then, here are a few fun ones…." [...]
I work in a grocery store. Just today I had a customer who couldn’t believe we wouldn’t accept his Target store coupon.
Ha, love these posts!
I adore these posts. The last lady is the most ridiculous to me, since you explicitly asked her if she meant wordLESS books. Use your brain, woman!
Aren’t people obsessed with How-to and DIY books these days! And who says kindergarten teaches you nothing? It just people didn’t pay attention to kindergarten!
I’d like to chuckle, but I’m sure I’ve said stupider things in the past. It’s the way of the world.
I love these posts! People can be so ridiculous.
–Anna
These stories are too funny!
[...] Adventures in Bookselling v. 13 [...]
Actually there was a character named julia caesaris..http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julia_%28daughter_of_Julius_Caesar%29 who was julius caesars daughter… probably even a book on her.